WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition [CLOSED]

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ratsoalbion
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WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition [CLOSED]

Post by ratsoalbion »

Courtesy of our very own James Carter we have a brand new, sealed copy of Io's latest (PAL EUR format) to give away.

All you have to do is tell us - if you absolutely had to hit* one man - who would it be and why?

*Hit as in a bop on the nose/cuff across the chops - not double tap to the skull

Post in this thread by MIDNIGHT GMT TONIGHT (19th November 2012) and the answer that entertains us the most will be sent the game.

NB: C&R crew may enter but cannot win
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DomsBeard
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by DomsBeard »

Simon Cowell, for ruining music, Jedward, stopping christmas number ones being christmas songs and more importantly every weekend in my being ruined by my wife watching that god damn farce of a show.
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ratsoalbion
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by ratsoalbion »

That's three men!
:P
Edit: Sorry I misunderstood. Thought you wanted to hit Jedward too. Which would be totally understandable ;)
Roy42

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Roy42 »

Reggie Fils-Aime.

If I could bloody his nose and get some of the blood on my hand, I'd be able to clone him for myself, Austin Powers style, like a Mini Reggie! But wait: He doesn't bleed like us puny humans… *sigh* Back to the drawing board.
Toffer

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Toffer »

I nearly went for Sir Richard Branson but pipping him to the post, has to be that smart-arsed little twat Justin Bieber.

What a waste of oxygen, a cock-womble of the highest order if there ever was one. If there had to be an appointed King of Douche Land, it would be him.

I just want to bop him right on the nose during the middle of a song.

Bieber: "Baby, baby, baby ohhHHHH Ow, my fucking nose, what the fuck!?"

Me: "That's for the last five years and trying it on with Cheryl Cole, fuckface."
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NokkonWud
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by NokkonWud »

ratsoalbion wrote:That's three men!
:P
Edit: Sorry I misunderstood. Thought you wanted to hit Jedward too. Which would be totally understandable ;)
Probably wants to beat Simon Cowell *with* Jedward! :D
Lego Solo

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Lego Solo »

Sir, lord, queen, king or whatever other title he has somehow managed to buy himself, Alan Sugar!

If I ever catch the apprentice on TV and see that huge wrinkly grumpy arse face on it I have an over whelming urge to punch the screen in the faint hope that he may just sense my anger towards him!! He's an outdated, bullying businessman with about as much sense as a blind dog chasing a car on a motorway! I mean seriously, how can someone who claims to be a top business mind make the idiotic prediction that the iPod would be dead and buried within a few years of launch!? All that says to me is that he was a lucky bastard that was in the right place at the right time in the 80s. Now he leaves all the "real" business to the people around him who actually know what the fuck they're doing while he clogs up my TV with his little stubby finger!!

And don't even get me started on his time at spurs in the 90s or I'll end up throwing my laptop clear across the room.

Sugar, I've got five bony friends with your name written all over them and believe me it ain't gonna be a sweet encounter!!!
Mijmeister

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Mijmeister »

I would hit Alan Titchmarsh.

Reason: For being so full of himself, inviting guests onto his crappy TV talk show, not doing research on the subject (see the interview with a CVG representative on the Video Game Baftas in 2010) and then slating the person who is PRO subject and then being shut down by said person for being so god damn ignorant. He is an ABSOLUTE bellend.
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Combine Hunter
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Combine Hunter »

I'm not entering this competition, being a cane and rinse member and all. So can someone please say Rupert Murdoch? He's a hundred times worse than anyone mentioned so far
Xantiriad

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Xantiriad »

I already have the game so this is for amusement only.

Margaret Thatcher circa 1975

Virtually all the modern social ills of this country were a direct result of her, and her later governments, marginalisation of whole groups of people: the north, the manufacturer, the council tenant, the railway infrastructure/legacy, the household water consumer, the energy user, the bank borrower, and so on.

Rampant deregulation and selling of national assets for short term gain; putting basic infrastructure in the hands of untrustworthy business men with shallow pockets and short-termist views. Allowing the "economic miracle" to create a national debt bigger than the 2nd world war. The social damage done by the economic revolutionists of the 1980s is likely to take generations to resolve.
furyac3

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by furyac3 »

Going to be honest here there is only one (well two) people I would smash and if you follow me on twitter odds are you'll know who it is !

Iain ugly waste of space time and air teeth like a set of broken back-door stairs needs a wash Lee

A true and utter arse of a person in the world if every there was one only bettered by Jason Bradbury (the other person I would smash) for being a guy who does nothing REALLY (dont defend them) and then boosts about getting into cool events o I was at this PR event and I was at this PR event all he does is press play on the CD player if you going to say he has a radio show ! Chirst people like them piss me off the most in the world 0 skill and get treated like they something special

F**k Bradbury went to the main Halo 4 launch and had the cheek the F**KING CHEEK to sign things along with the three 343 guys that where there guys that got payed for working on the game who's names are in the credits but that bald twat signed things along with them guides / steelbooks / games like he was one of them well NO hes not and now for any fans of Halo trying to get they hands on the signed stuff everything and i mean everything is signed by that F**k WIT too AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA bloody rage at fact i really am !

so i leave you these two pictures to haunt your dreams and you children as the true face of terror in the word !

http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?num=10&u ... ,s:0,i:119

http://www.zimbio.com/Jason+Bradbury/pictures/pro/2010
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NokkonWud
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by NokkonWud »

There's one person mentioned in this thread that I totally agree with. Those who know me will know exactly who, too.
But I'm not voting.
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Dante Fireseed
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Dante Fireseed »

furyac3 wrote:F**k Bradbury went to the main Halo 4 launch and had the cheek the F**KING CHEEK to sign things along with the three 343 guys that where there guys that got payed for working on the game who's names are in the credits but that bald twat signed things along with them guides / steelbooks / games like he was one of them well NO hes not and now for any fans of Halo trying to get they hands on the signed stuff everything and i mean everything is signed by that F**k WIT too AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA bloody rage at fact i really am !

so i leave you these two pictures to haunt your dreams and you children as the true face of terror in the word !
haha this one really made me laugh - my vote goes here, he really is a complete nonse, and this story just beggers belief!
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PressEscToExit
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by PressEscToExit »

Hello I would like to donate a game for the opportunity to headbutt Adam Levine of Maroon 5 off a bridge.
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ratsoalbion
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by ratsoalbion »

It's not a vote, people! The single answer that I enjoy the most wins the game.
Bakers_12

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Bakers_12 »

Celine bloody Dion
I would like to make her suffer like how I suffered one summer in my teens when my neighbour played her album on repeat every day, all day long! All I wanted to do was play a bit of mortal Konbat on the SNES, but all I would hear over and over was that woman!!! proper spoiled the ambiance of the game! Leave me in a room with her and we will see how long her heart will go on!!!!
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FollowMyRuin
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by FollowMyRuin »

The person who thought of this scene....fast forward to 3:33.....chilling!

http://youtu.be/cv8U1Dn6zc8
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DomsBeard
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Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by DomsBeard »

FollowMyRuin wrote:The person who thought of this scene....fast forward to 3:33.....chilling!

http://youtu.be/cv8U1Dn6zc8
My mate once pulled a girl who looked exactly like that Gremlin we called him Gizmo for ages!!! :D
strickenmcq

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by strickenmcq »

Jamie Redknapp with a pair of trousers in his real size, I do not want to see what he has for his dinner thanks!
Darn Ragnar

Re: WIN Hitman: Absolution Professional Edition for Xbox 360

Post by Darn Ragnar »

First up-For Combinehunter...As a fellow aussie I have first dibs on punching Rupert Murdoch in the face. The man is scum and a disgrace to not just his home country of Australia, but to people in general. Then again he moved to the UK so clearly he is already afraid of me ;-)

For my real pick...hmmmm. So many choices. Whoever invented reality television? Random annoying celebrity? People who pirate "Pay what you want bundles" that you can buy for 1c and support indie developers and charity? No. I'll go for something personal...
.
.
.
.
.
Me!!

Just so I can recreate that scene in fight club where Edward Norton beats the crap out of himself. Why? I have no idea.
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